🦄 Death to Unicorns

They're cute...until someone loses an eye

I like unicorns. I have friends who are unicorns. But let’s get something straight: you are not a unicorn.

The myth of the “nonprofit unicorn” is cute—until it’s weaponized. Until it becomes the excuse leadership uses to demand superhuman results from already maxed-out staff. Until it becomes the reason we normalize burnout, turnover, and trauma, which is just another Tuesday in fundraising.

And here’s the truth no one wants to say: you don’t fix this by working harder. You fix it by saying no.

🧠 The Sparkly Lie That’s Breaking Us

According to the Center for Effective Philanthropy’s 2024 report:

• 95% of nonprofit leaders say burnout is a major concern.

• 76% say it’s actively interfering with mission success.

• Development staff face some of the highest turnover, with an average nonprofit turnover rate of 21%—nearly double the national average.

This is not just bad luck. This is the fallout of a system designed on fantasy and maintained through silence.

Every time a Development Director burns out, walks out, or is quietly pushed out for “not hitting goals,” you lose more than a résumé. You lose momentum, institutional knowledge, donor trust, and in many cases, hundreds of thousands in revenue. One org tracked a $500,000 drop in event revenue after a key fundraiser left. That’s not a blip. That’s a crisis.

💸 Let’s Talk Price Tags

Here’s what it actually costs to replace a fundraiser:

• 90–200% of their salary (in recruiting, onboarding, and lost productivity).

• 6–12 months to rebuild donor relationships.

• Untold damage to staff morale and team cohesion.

Nonprofit turnover isn’t just a human issue—it’s a bottom-line issue.

But instead of addressing the cause, too many EDs and Boards just slap on another job posting and keep the hamster wheel spinning.

🧨 Boardroom Delusions: The Leadership Wake-Up Call

Let’s not mince words: this is a leadership failure.

It’s time Executive Directors and Boards stop confusing their titles with actual expertise. Your finance background does not make you a development strategist. Your corporate success does not make you a nonprofit visionary.

Nonprofit work isn’t magic. It’s labor. It’s strategy. It’s relationship-building. And if your boardroom doesn’t trust the people doing the actual work to shape the strategy, then you don’t have a staff problem—you have an ego problem.

Sustainable fundraising starts with sustainable expectations. If you’re approving goals without approving the resources to reach them, that’s not ambition. That’s malpractice.

You’re not “visionary” if your plan hinges on a miracle.

You’re not “inspiring” if your leadership style is exploitation in a blazer.

🚫 Say it with Me: “No.”

“No, we can’t hit an arbitrary million-dollar goal because someone in leadership is ‘feeling bullish’ – or is jealous of another organization in town.

“No, we won’t run a gala on fumes and fairy dust”

“No, we won’t chase a $10k grant that costs $15k in reporting”

This isn’t negativity. This is boundaries. This is respect. This is how professionals behave when they value their work and well-being.

It takes confidence, courage, and, most importantly, getting sick enough of the cycle to finally stop feeding it.

🎯 Here’s What Real Leadership Looks Like:

• · Mission over vanity metrics. Not everything needs a logo wall and a gala

• · Strategy over martyrdom. Burned-out teams don’t drive bold outcomes

• · Respect over hierarchy. Stop pretending fundraising happens in a vacuum

• · Collaboration over control. Your staff are experts. Let them lead

🔥 The Call to Action

You are not here to conjure million-dollar miracles from a budget that wouldn’t buy printer ink at a hedge fund. Nonprofit professionals: You have the right—and the responsibility—to say no.

Not because you’re “difficult.” Because you are the expert in the room. And the mission depends on your sustainability.

Executive Directors and Board members: If you’re not listening, you’re losing.

Losing staff. Losing money. Losing ground on the mission you claim to support.

It’s time to stop romanticizing the hustle and start respecting the humans.

Start replacing delusion with discipline.

Start building a culture where your most powerful strategy isn’t just saying yes—it’s knowing when to say:

“Actually… no.”

✅ Three Things You Can Do After Reading This

1. Run a Reality Check

Look at your current fundraising goals, team bandwidth, and budget. Are they aligned? If not, write down three changes you can advocate for this week.

2. Set (or Reset) One Clear Boundary

Identify a specific expectation, event, or process that needs to shift. Then have the conversation. “No” is a complete sentence—but you can also explain it with clarity and data.

3. Start a Conversation in Your Org

Forward this article to your ED, Board Chair, or fellow fundraisers. Use it to start a real conversation about expectations, sustainability, and leadership. Change starts with truth-telling.